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When a person is contemplating a divorce, he or she seeks information from all available sources, including, but not limited to, the internet, and family and friends. While family and friends have good intentions, their divorce experience is based upon the facts and circumstances that are unique to their marriage and divorce and are likely different than your unique set of circumstances. The information obtained online, whether from websites, posts or social media, often contains inaccurate information, half-truths, and catchy slogans to generate interest for a particular purpose.
While it is true that the internet is a valuable resource, information regarding issues related to divorce is often incorrect and may pertain to a jurisdiction other than New Jersey. There is no question that misinformation is widespread, and reliance upon information you have obtained from browsing the web or been provided by a well-meaning friend or family member can be harmful, particularly when it relates to custody of your children and/or financial relief you are seeking in your divorce proceeding.
The following myths set forth for your consideration have been relayed to our attorneys on the Family Law Team at Cohn Lifland:
- New Jersey law provides for lifetime alimony. There is a misconception that alimony continues for the duration of the payor’s lifetime. New Jersey law does not provide for a lifetime obligation, and the statute sets forth the two most common forms of alimony as “limited duration alimony,” sometimes referred to as “term alimony,” and “open durational alimony,” previously referred to as “permanent alimony.” For further discussion, see Is There a Lifetime Alimony Obligation?
- As soon as I retire, I can stop paying alimony. When a couple divorces, one spouse may be ordered to pay alimony, also called spousal support to the other. If you are making alimony payments, it is important to be aware that retirement does not bring an automatic end to an alimony obligation. Whether the payor is entitled to a termination or modification will depend upon a number of factors, including the specific terms of the divorce settlement agreement or court order that established the alimony payments and your age when you retire. For further discussion, see Can I Retire if I am Paying Alimony?
- Sole legal custody of the children is common in New Jersey. This is not true. Child custody is a complex issue, and in accordance with New Jersey law, it is more common for parties to exercise joint legal custody with both parents having input and decision-making regarding the child’s health, education and welfare. In fewer situations, sole legal custody is awarded when one parent is deemed unfit to participate in the decision-making for the child or is absent from the child’s life.
- A Final Restraining Order Entered by the court after a Domestic Violence Hearing expires after a few years. While this is the law in other jurisdictions, in New Jersey, Domestic Violence Final Restraining Orders do not expire after a period of time. A person against whom a Final Restraining Order has been entered has the right to appeal the issuance of the Order by the Judge within 45 days, the victim may voluntarily dismiss the Final Restraining Order by appearing in Court and placing this on the record, or the person against whom the Final Restraining Order has been entered may file a Motion seeking to have the Final Restraining Order vacated. After filing the Motion, the Court will schedule a hearing and follow the law in Carfagno v. Carfagno, 288 N.J. Super. 424 (Ch. Div. 1995) to decide whether to dismiss the Final Restraining Order. There are numerous factors for the Court to consider, including, but not limited to, the current relationship of the parties, the age and health of the Defendant, whether the Defendant has previously violated the Order, whether the Defendant has other violent offenses on record, attends counselling, or has other Restraining Orders.
- If I am the Primary Residential Parent, I can relocate from New Jersey to a different state with my children without consent of the other parent. In New Jersey, children of divorced or separated parents cannot move with the children outside of New Jersey unless there is consent between the parents or a Court Order authorizing their move. Relocation disputes are guided by the New Jersey Supreme Court decision of Bisbing v. Bisbing, 230 N.J. 309 (2017). In all contested relocation disputes in which the parents share joint legal custody, the Court will conduct a best interest analysis, which often includes best interest reports prepared by mental health professionals and testimony regarding the statutory custody factors. For further discussion, see Relocation and Divorce: Can I Move With the Children?
Reliance upon misinformation is likely to be detrimental to protecting your legal rights and those of your children during your divorce matter. The attorneys at Cohn Lifland have expertise in all areas related to your divorce. They can assist you in proceeding in the proper manner and advise you as to how you can best navigate the divorce process. Instead of relying upon the internet and family and friends, contact the experienced family lawyers at Cohn Lifland to discuss your specific circumstances based on New Jersey law to ensure that you are well-informed and proceeding consistent with your best interests.